It’s the end of the work day. All around the country kids are getting home hoping to catch a few cartoons before they make a start on their homework.

Flicking on the tv, you’d expect to see Chinese dubbed versions of Barney the Dinosaur, Pokemon or even the Wiggles.

…then you remember you’re in Taiwan.

It was roughly 5pm on a weekday and I’d just gotten back from a day out exploring. I was channel surfing and within seconds was glad I didn’t own a HD widescreen television.

Something about testicle implant underwear just doesn’t sit right with me. Especially when we’re talking extreme close-ups of the action and crotch thrusting into the camera.


Some kid just got home from school and is trying to do his homework and then this comes on:

‘mummy mummy I decided what I want for Christmas!’

‘oh?… What did you have in mind dear?’;

‘GIANT BALLS LIKE ON THE TV!’

Imagine the girl you’re trying to impress is that superficial that having a big crotch is a deal breaker for her. Throughout the night you impress her with your giant package and then when you get home she takes your undies off… ‘ohhhhhhh. Hey listen I have to go wash my hair’.

It’d be like if a guy saw a girl with a beautiful C cup, gets home and after removing her bra sees two little A cup insect bites. Probably not enough to go home and wash your hair over but still you’d be a little disappointed.

I was led to believe Taiwan was a conservative society. Between giant posters of bikini girls outside adult KTVs, betel nut girls wearing next to nothing sitting in goldfish bowl type stands and crotch implant underwear on television during primetime… now I’m not so sure.