Scenario 1: Jack goes rabbit shooting before school, pulls into school parking lot with rifle in gun rack.

1959 – Vice Principal comes over, looks at Jack’s rifle, goes to his car and gets his rifle & chats with Jack about guns.

2009 – School goes into lock down, Star Force called, Jack hauled off to jail and never sees his Ute or gun again. Counsellors called in for traumatized students and teachers.

Scenario 2: Johnny and Mark get into a fistfight after school.

1959 – Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up buddies.

2009 – Police called, SWAT team arrives, arrests Johnny and Mark. Charge them with assault, both expelled even though Johnny started it.

Scenario 3: Robbie won’t be still in class, disrupts other students.

1959 – Robbie sent to office and given 6 of the best by the Principal. Returns to class, sits still and does not disrupt class again.

2009 – Robbie given huge doses of Ritalin. Becomes a zombie. Tested for ADD. School gets extra money from state because Robbie has a disability.

Scenario 4: Billy breaks a window in his neighbour’s car and his Dad gives him a whipping with his belt.

1959 – Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college, and becomes a successful businessman.

2009 – Billy’s dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy removed to foster care and joins a gang. State psychologist tells Billy’s sister that she remembers being abused herself and their dad goes to prison. Billy’s mom has affair with psychologist.

Scenario 5: Mark gets a headache and takes some aspirin to school.

1959 – Mark gets glass of water from Principal to take aspirin with.

2009 – Police called, Mark expelled from school for drug violations. Car searched for drugs and weapons.

Scenario 6: Pedro fails high school English.

1959 – Pedro goes to summer school, passes English and goes to college.

2009 – Pedro’s cause is taken up by state. Newspaper articles appear nationally explaining that teaching English as a requirement for graduation is racist.

AFRE files class action lawsuit against state school system and Pedro’s English teacher.. English banned from core curriculum.

Pedro given diploma anyway but ends up mowing lawns for a living because he cannot speak English.

Scenario 7: Johnny takes apart leftover firecrackers from 4th of July, puts them in a model airplane paint bottle, blows up a bullant’s nest.

1959 – Ants die.

2009 – Star Force, Federal Police & Anti-terrorism Squad called. Johnny charged with domestic terrorism, Feds investigate parents, siblings removed from home, computers confiscated,

Johnny’s Dad goes on a terror watch list and is never allowed to fly again.

Scenario 8: Johnny falls while running during recess and scrapes his knee. He is found crying by his teacher, Mary. Mary hugs him to comfort him.

1959 – In a short time, Johnny feels better and goes on playing.

2009 – Mary is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She faces 3 years in Prison. Johnny undergoes 5 years of therapy.


The above is a joke email that most of you should have seen by now having been widely circulated over the last decade.

It seems however that somebody forgot to tell Queensland that it wasn’t a roadmap for state government policy in our schools…

Kids these days are forced by society to grow up fast. From an early age they are bombarded with sexual advertising. Magazines featuring women with giant breasts in string bikinis line the aisles of shops, giant yellow billboards on the drive to school ask them if they are “getting enough sex?” and flick on a television and it won’t take long for something sexually suggestive to come on.

Parents start thinking about their current choices and how they might affect their child’s future career from seemingly earlier and earlier ages each year. Sometimes seemingly before the child is even born.

With so much pressure and media exposure thrust upon them, naturally kids are going to be curious. Internet filtering or not, they now have a world of information at their fingertips to feed this curiosity.

It’s too late to play the blame game we just have to accept that if we want all our freedoms that’s the way it is. What we can focus on however is how react to this new ‘coming of age’ of the younger generation.

A primary school in Queensland has shown us exactly how not to react to this situation.

Education Queensland admitted there was a crisis of confidence at the school on Brisbane’s northern outskirts.

A third of pupils have been taken out of school after a raft of alleged sexual incidents.

There have been 18 recorded cases at the Queensland school since last year with 11 incidents reported to police.


Usually it’s a teacher involved in this type of story but this time it’s students sexually abusing students and amidst a sea of paranoia, blame and bad parenting the auth0rities have been called in.

With both male and female kids running around feeling eachother up how did the school choose to respond?

Education Queensland director-general Julie Grantham acknowledged what was happening at the school was “not normal.”

Staff have since been given extra child protection training, teacher aide time has been increased in the playground, a psychologist was giving specialised support to children and parents were also being addressed by Family Planning Queensland.


Oh dear.

If this response is any indication then it seems Queensland is well on its way to raising a whole new generation of confused sexually repressed adults.

So do we blame the kids, the parents raising the kids or just accept that by turning our kids into mini adults this is what’s going to happen? Of course not, instead we just scape the principal.

Queensland Teachers Union members have also taken a vote of no confidence in the principal, who is under a separate investigation by the department.


Unless the school is sponsored by Club X or something, how exactly is the principal to blame here? This sort of behaviour is picked up at home and then brought to the playground.

Furthermore;

“With the sexual assaults, we have done a separate investigation into the full handling of this and the school has followed all the appropriate behaviours.

“They have followed the checklist in every one of the cases.”


So the school followed protocol as set out for the state government, yet we’re voting no confidence in the principal? How about a vote of no confidence in the stupid government policy in relation to “sexual assaults” in schools he or she was following?

Obviously these problems have massively failed but don’t worry, the government is onto it. They believe it’s spiralled out of control due to unaddressed copy-cat behaviour.

Griffith University School of Criminology and Criminal Justice, Professor Stephen Smallbone (hehe smalbone) said children could be influenced by their peers’ behaviour.


…really, they had to go and ask a professor whether or not kids copy other kids? Seriously are parents, teachers and the authorities that detached from the kids they are supposed to be raising, protecting and working with?

I remember in my primary school years two incidents that these days would have probably resulted in similar action being taken against the school and ‘sexual predator’ children attending.

The first was in grade one or so from memory. It was a brief incident where one boy realised he could flash his genitals to girls in the playground and chase them around, much to their amusement.

The second was a year or so later when a bit of touchy feely was going on between boys and girls at the school oval during lunchtime.

In both cases teachers spoke to the students after ‘breaking it up’ and explained that their actions were inappropriate.

Life went on, no police were called and there certainly wasn’t any need to tear the school apart on a witch hunt.

I’m certainly not saying we need to encourage orgy house primary schools or not address children’s curiosity when it arises but do we really need to label them as sex offenders and call in the authorities?

God knows how messed up personal relationships are going to be fifty years from now…

1. Johnny Depp in Taiwan